As I walk out the door…

I am leaving today on a very high adrenaline rush… bursting with excitement but shadowed with a hint of hesitation.

I am off to be one of the lucky few who will welcome Baby Sukigara into this world – something I have dreamed about for months. A last minute flight coupled with the chaotic preparations for my departure made for a very hectic evening and an almost tearful morning. I am not one to easily pick up and go. I love to be spontaneous and I’m always up for a trip anywhere but the tasks required to prepare for my time away nearly always sends me into a panic attack… especially when I am leaving my family, my babies behind. I mean isn’t my family entirely dependant upon me to survive? As I go through the weekend, minute by minute, I begin to panic…

Did I confirm the babysitter? Did I leave Roger our babysitter’s number? What if she doesn’t show up on time? That means Riley will miss his high school orientation – I am now convinced that Riley’s high school years will be destined for failure if they don’t go to orientation.

Ah, but then I recall – Riley doesn’t even want to go to orientation so worst case scenario – he gets his wishes and his high school career starts out with a bit of confusion but an overall happy outlook because we didn’t force him to go to orientation.

I spend a few blissful moments dreaming about Baby Sukigara and then…

Hmmm, do I believe that Riley really got a ride to and from BBall practice on Friday? If he doesn’t have a ride home then he’ll sit at the school all by himself at 9:45 at night and he could be kidnapped and Roger can’t leave to pick him up because the little kids are in bed and oh… ok, worst case scenario he walks home. It’s only a mile. And really, his coach is not going to leave him without a ride. Ok, and honestly I heard him confirm his ride so what am I worrying about?

And just when I think the bloody mary is kicking in and I’m starting to lose the edginess – relaxation is on the horizon…

Uh oh, I just remembered that Roger will have to put Hope’s hair up for ballet on Saturday… well this ought to be interesting! Unfortunately, I have the camera with me. Hope will probably have short hair when I get home and she’ll need therapy for years…

Regardless, I am walking out the door... And as I walk out the door I am overwhelmed with happiness and gratitude.

I just love Heather and Doug and I am so grateful for our friendship and their willingness and eagerness to share the miracle of their baby with me. A testament to our friendship and everlasting bond. I’ve been the lucky enough to witness so many special births now and these are the memories that I cherish more than most. I am lucky… and thankful…

Thankful that I share the birth of Riley with Mom and Heather (and yes, even Grandma June). Thankful that Sarah and Elizabeth made it (albeit just in time) for Hope’s arrival.
Thankful that Sarah and Janet were there for the birth of baby Nico.
Thankful, of course, for Roger who was always by my side.
A little sad that Mom tried so hard to be there for Hope and Nico but just couldn’t make it in the end… but very thankful for her determination – my children just don’t have a history of being very cooperative when it comes to birthdays :)
I am thankful for all those dearest of friends and family who shared their special birthdays with me and I am thankful for yet another opportunity to make a very special memory with Baby Sukigara.

I am thankful for Carrie and Sarah for all their support with the Gronke clan their crazy schedule this weekend.

I am so grateful and enamored with Roger who repeatedly encouraged me to take advantage of this opportunity and who graciously ensured this adventure became a reality. I probably should be worried because he keeps telling the kids that when Mommy’s away he’ll be making some changes for the better. But these changes involve hot pockets for dinner and a weekend of movies and napping so I am at ease – they all will thoroughly enjoy their own little vacation. They’ll be just fine without me as long as it’s only for a short time.

I will return all too soon to restore order and structure to the Gronke household. In the meantime… party on! Baby Sukigara, please, please wait for me!