Meeting In The Middle

Perhaps I am just a tad bit old fashioned… No! Not me… I won’t stand for being old fashioned.

Or

Perhaps I am just a tad bit grumpy… well, that’s all very well and likely – something I must work on.

Or

Perhaps I am just a tad bit jealous… remembering my carefree youth. Oh, the good old days…

Or

Perhaps I am just a mother struggling to offer up some well deserved and age worthy freedom because I am blindly determined to instill a sense of responsibility in my children.

Yes, that is probably... most likely... definitely my justification…

I tiptoed into Riley’s room this morning to say good-bye and strategically place the phone where I could arouse him from his slumber should the need arise.

To my surprise...

And curiosity...

And frustration...

And anger...

I found him with red droopy eyes, still awake playing XBOX with Nick. Pulling an all-nighter and mighty proud of it they were.

Not what I expected as they were stealthy quiet through the evening.

Perplexed that they actually did make it until 8:30 in the morning.

Frustrated that we’re only two days into summer break and dreading that this is what the summer will hold. Games all night and sleeping the day away.

And angry because this all-nighter certainly meant Riley forgot to wear his rubber bands and he’s so close to getting his braces off – simply waiting for those last couple weeks for the teeth to move into final position that can only be secured by constant wearing of woven rubber bands that literally clench his jaw shut.

A few choice words threatening some life long braces compelled me to make an immediate departure to let my emotions settle.

A few deep breaths brought a new perspective.

These boys were safely tucked away in Riley’s room all night which surely meant a day of sleep. A day where I don’t have to wonder where he is and worry about his safety.

The occasional all-nighter is a fond memory that I sporadically divulged in as a teenager.

The boys were respectful of our sleep, whispering and tiptoeing making sure not to arouse us.

Riley hasn’t had his XBOX in over 7 months. He obviously had some serious catching up to do.

I rented the video games – seriously, what did I expect? A teenager who would willingly set the controller down at 10 p.m. to catch a good night’s sleep?? Perhaps I should convey that expectation ahead of time in the future…

Riley will all too soon be departing early each day for football and much of the summer beholds daily doubles which will require at least some sleep each night and encourage self responsibility.

With my emotions settled and the frustration lifted I meandered into work determined not to let anger get the best of me. When Riley rang me on my way home I cheerfully bid him good morning and promised to make him some dinner certain he was famished from his daily slumber.

After a personal pep talk on the remainder of my drive I entered the house to find Riley vacuuming his room, the dishwasher emptied, dished washed and dried, and rubber bands woven all throughout his mouth.

Perhaps we met in the middle on this one… not immediately seeing eye-to-eye but respecting our different roles – Riley, as a teenager, quite simply just enjoying his summer and I, as a parent, just trying to instill responsibility.

I do honestly hope Riley enjoyed his all-nighter. These are the easy days – life only burdens you with more and more responsibility as you get older. I want him to occasionally enjoy these simple pleasures while he can.

In the end I have resolved to encourage Riley to limit his all-nighters so they maintain their element of fun embodied with a proud sense of accomplishment – all while ensuring they do not interfere with the other joys of summer. I am covertly teaching him to be responsible with his freedom but enjoy these years nonetheless.

I have a whole shebang of lessons stocked away to teach my children over the years but I often think that Riley subtly and patiently teaches me more about parenting each day than in any lesson I could offer up to him.

That, my friends, is one of Riley’s many endearing qualities and is just one more reason I love that boy to bits.