Defined by Rules

With the demands of a full time job and a full house I am finding it increasingly difficult to find the time to actually write down the many blogs that I sketch out in my head as events unravel each day. But today I had an epiphany – albeit the result of a comment from a very calculating and scheming 14 year old who is all about what’s in this for me?… Riley told me I always do things by the book. I am defined by rules!

Me???

No, not me!

And what book are you even talking about???? What rules???

Ok, I may not be creative by I do NOT live my life defined by rules.

I like to think my parenting style falls into the category of “whatever works”. I let my kids stay up WAY late… they watch WAY too many movies just because they want to… we bake decadent chocolate cakes at 11:00 p.m. because we’re hungry… we all sleep in until 10:30 on the weekends because we stayed up WAY too late… we go to Starbucks when we’re grumpy… really, whatever works!

Regardless, Riley’s comment stuck with me like a lead balloon, weighing me down. I am compelled to prove that I am NOT defined by rules. So, as much as I hate resolutions I have resolved to do more things spontaneously – things that are most definitely NOT BY THE BOOK (still, whatever that book may be).

This means more blogging and less working! Work is unquestionably not spontaneous and blogging has no rules (only those self imposed rules about what you shouldn’t write because you might offend someone)… well, be forewarned I do not have any of those rules on my blog. I blog so that I can re-live everything through written memories. I simply try not to write with limits.

This also means that I will teach Riley to drive this year – that is certainly not based on the guide to good parenting handbook or even the state laws for that matter. Barb, are you up to fulfilling that promise of teaching Riley to drive because I am all in… it’ll be impulsive!

All this so that when I ask Riley if I am still doing things by the book he will cock his head with the questioning look of “what the heck are you talking about”? He’ll deny he ever made the comment but I will know that I am living life and parenting my children within the realm of the “whatever works and makes for fantastic memories” guide to life (which I just might have to write someday – if I am successful).

14 year olds are very conniving and they are fully aware of what buttons to push. But I think their insight is often just what is needed to alter our perspectives as parents – reminding us that as parents we don’t always have to be the evil grinch stealing the fun out of childhood. We can bend the rules and help them make the most of their short time as teenagers.

Don’t worry, I’ll only let him drive in parking lots… for now…